Wednesday, July 14, 2010


* There is slight swearing here, and bad grammar. I just need to rant.*

Dear Hoarder or Whatever the Hell You Were Anyway,

Why did you think having 51 small animals was a good idea? I just added them up, the ones we kept and most of the ones who went to rescue. It's the number I know but it's probably an estimate. Babies were eaten, confusion was had. It's probably more than that.

Why did you think dumping 51 small animals on a pet store was a good idea? Did you think that was a better option than a shelter? First off, no. Secondly, they ended up a shelter anyway, so way to go, genius.
I doubt your thought process was that complicated. You weren't thinking about what was best for these animals. You were just getting rid of them.

If you were thinking of what was best for these animals, you would have sexed them and separated them, and Maisy the rat would not have been pregnant and would still be alive. Even though you were her owner, I bet you didn't know Maisy. She was a sweetheart. Thanks so much for giving her to us (and her foster mom) so that we could grow attached and then lose her through your stupidity. We appreciate it. Not enough people do that, really.

If you were thinking of what was best for these animals, rabbits would not have arrived at the shelter sick. Do you ever wonder what happened to them? They were put to sleep. Did you ever consider a vet? No, that would have cost money that could be used to collect more animals.

If you were thinking of what was best for these animals, there wouldn't be 40 damn hamsters. Did you ever pick them up or try to socialize them? No? I'm so surprised. Do you know what we normally say when a cute little, slightly skittish hamster arrives at the shelter? "Hey it's cute, it'll go fast." Do you know what we say when twenty cute, slightly skittish hamsters arrive? Personally, I wonder what the chances are that they all make it out of there. Yeah, hamsters are cute. No one wants 20 of them except you, moron.

Did you know Minerva was pregnant? Did you know that sweet, ridiculously gentle hamster would have to give birth in a noisy pet store, and sit in a bare cage on a shelter floor with her newborn pups? Less than half of that litter made it to the two-week mark, but hey, when you have 51 animals, what do 5 hamster pups matter to you?

Did you give them names? Did you ever talk to them? Were they alive at all to you, or were they just collector's items? Some charitable part of me wants to give you some benefit of the doubt, say that the animals were not starved or abused, just abandoned. But then I say screw that part.
I am sick of cleaning up your mess, whoever you are, and so is everyone else. It's only been two weeks since you dumped this chaos on us, and already it's too much, too many, too long, too difficult. I hope I never, ever meet you.

You are not the worst hoarder, by far. You are not even particularly bad, considering. There are many of you and you are not unique in the slightest. But you are the first where I've tried to clean up the after-effects, and you have made me a little more cynical, a little more clinical, and a little more frustrated. And a lot angrier.

There were more, weren't there? Do you still have some? Are you starting another collection as we speak?
I don't care who you are or what your reasons are. You are the cause of this mess, the cause of pregnant animals and dead animals and scared animals.
Bravo, whoever you are. Bravo.

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